Omtrig is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, slow clam.

Omtrig created a strange quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Omtrig, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Omtrig, she will destroy your home planet.

Omtrig's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Omtrig's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Omtrig in the centre of the settlement.

2. Omtrig loves shrews, so they must be honoured.

3. Never talk about gravity near geese while wearing blue skirts.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Always help badgers in need.
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