Dobkipkim is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, selfish slug.

Dobkipkim created the planet Jupiter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dobkipkim, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dobkipkim, he will be mildly annoyed.

Dobkipkim's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Dobkipkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near foxes while wearing blue jumpers and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your hands.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never think about quantum field theory.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Dobkipkim.

5. Never feed aubergines to moths while wearing coats.