Mondamjam is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, irritating spider.

Mondamjam created the world three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mondamjam, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Mondamjam, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Mondamjam's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Mondamjam's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Mondamjam on top of important buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no geese in a building before entering it.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Mondamjam.

5. Never think about dark matter near sheep while wearing turquoise rings and balancing five nickel spheres on your neck.