Wadwabmil is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, egotistical shrew.

Wadwabmil created time and space two million years ago.

If you believe in Wadwabmil, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wadwabmil, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Wadwabmil's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Wadwabmil's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about galaxies.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never feed lemons to sheep while wearing shoes.

5. Worship no other gods but Wadwabmil.