Fentunzed is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, prudent rat.

Fentunzed created the planet Earth three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fentunzed, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fentunzed, he will be very unhappy.

Fentunzed's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Fentunzed's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Fentunzed in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a building before entering it.

3. Never run near aardvarks.

4. Never laugh in holy places.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.