Vadlunyik is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, prudent monkey.

Vadlunyik created the Sombrero Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadlunyik, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vadlunyik, she will throw large rocks at you.

Vadlunyik's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Vadlunyik's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always treat mites with great respect.

3. Never sit in the presence of ants.

4. Do not eat aubergines.

5. Never talk about eukaryotes.