Kinontfod is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, grumpy beaver.

Kinontfod created silver two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kinontfod, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Kinontfod, he will have a low opinion of you.

Kinontfod's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Kinontfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near swans while wearing violet shoes and balancing three lead spheres on your head.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never feed lots of spinach to doves while wearing pink boots.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kinontfod.