Timsatont is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, tiresome jackal.

Timsatont created water three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Timsatont, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Timsatont, she will turn you into a worm.

Timsatont's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Timsatont's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from magenta monkeys, for they are unholy.

2. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always help sick geese.

4. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.

5. Retreat if three manatees approach from the north.