Armkikcet is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, slow goat.

Armkikcet created the Tadpole Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Armkikcet, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Armkikcet, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Armkikcet's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Armkikcet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

5. Never write about black holes.