Dodjopgat is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, witty porpoise.

Dodjopgat created life eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dodjopgat, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dodjopgat, she will destroy your home solar system.

Dodjopgat's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Dodjopgat's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never talk about chlorophyll.