Pagafcip is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, able hare.

Pagafcip created the Cigar Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pagafcip, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Pagafcip, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Pagafcip's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Pagafcip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

2. Pagafcip must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not wear green clothing.

4. Do not eat carrots.

5. Never eat turnips.