Witmotfun is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, calm unicorn.

Witmotfun created the Milkyway nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Witmotfun, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Witmotfun, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Witmotfun's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Witmotfun's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at dwarf planets.

2. Do not hurt tortoises.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Witmotfun.