Gudvoncet is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, grumpy skunk.

Gudvoncet created a quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudvoncet, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gudvoncet, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Gudvoncet's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Gudvoncet's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight zinc sculptures of Gudvoncet on top of important buildings.

2. Worship no other gods but Gudvoncet.

3. Never wear pink skirts.

4. Horses are not to be trusted.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.