Nuttpombod is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, fussy hamster.

Nuttpombod created snails six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuttpombod, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nuttpombod, she will turn you into a snail.

Nuttpombod's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Nuttpombod's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime.

2. Do not dye your hair magenta.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not stand on grass.