Fatjigfag is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, blissful meerkat.

Fatjigfag created the planet Saturn five million years ago.

If you believe in Fatjigfag, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fatjigfag, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fatjigfag's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Fatjigfag's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate grasshopers.

2. Run away from red snails, for they are unholy.

3. Do not eat parsnips.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not shave your legs.