Wabdonlarp is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, awe-inspiring scorpion.

Wabdonlarp created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Wabdonlarp, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Wabdonlarp, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Wabdonlarp's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Wabdonlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never write about asteroids.

3. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

4. Never talk about ultrasonics.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.