Cubcamfiddissomtzedciss is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, staggering fairy.

Cubcamfiddissomtzedciss created the Sun seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubcamfiddissomtzedciss, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cubcamfiddissomtzedciss, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cubcamfiddissomtzedciss' most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Cubcamfiddissomtzedciss' Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never bounce near nematodes.

3. Do not hurt ants.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Learn eight new languages a year.