Rapvanpib Citpaslip Nurlfumvin is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, boastful dingo.

Rapvanpib Citpaslip Nurlfumvin created the Small Magellanic Cloud two billion years ago.

If you believe in Rapvanpib Citpaslip Nurlfumvin, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Rapvanpib Citpaslip Nurlfumvin, she will be very unhappy.

Rapvanpib Citpaslip Nurlfumvin's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Rapvanpib Citpaslip Nurlfumvin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bananas.

2. Never think about spacetime.

3. Never talk about special relativity near tortoises while wearing cyan coats.

4. Never sing in the presence of mites.

5. Never feed pineapples to shrews while wearing turquoise skirts.