Gepgutsug is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-assured badger.

Gepgutsug created the planet Earth four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepgutsug, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gepgutsug, he will boil you in a big pot.

Gepgutsug's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Gepgutsug's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in holy places.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never mention dogs.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.