Narlrakhunwig is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unthoughtful horse.

Narlrakhunwig created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Narlrakhunwig, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Narlrakhunwig, it will turn you into a hamster.

Narlrakhunwig's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Narlrakhunwig's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics near voles while wearing fawn rings and balancing four gold spheres on your feet.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never write about stars.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.