Bommigbif Fadcibdog Bestcumjarn is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, resourceful owl.

Bommigbif Fadcibdog Bestcumjarn created the world seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bommigbif Fadcibdog Bestcumjarn, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bommigbif Fadcibdog Bestcumjarn, it will turn you into a mole.

Bommigbif Fadcibdog Bestcumjarn's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Bommigbif Fadcibdog Bestcumjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

2. Feed all hungry monkeys.

3. Do not speak about peas.

4. Do not run in public.

5. You must never eat apples.