Metnutbanflag is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, generous hippopotamus.

Metnutbanflag created a top quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Metnutbanflag, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Metnutbanflag, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Metnutbanflag's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Metnutbanflag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about archaea.

4. Learn three new languages a year.

5. Never go into black rooms.