Xenvonkfad Jenfenfarsterbudmishad is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, flying meerkat.

Xenvonkfad Jenfenfarsterbudmishad created parasitic wasps seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Xenvonkfad Jenfenfarsterbudmishad, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Xenvonkfad Jenfenfarsterbudmishad, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Xenvonkfad Jenfenfarsterbudmishad's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Xenvonkfad Jenfenfarsterbudmishad's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear gray.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look after injured capybaras.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not make images of living things.