Sandmotkar is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, tranquil snail.

Sandmotkar created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Sandmotkar, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sandmotkar, it will turn you into a frog.

Sandmotkar's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Sandmotkar's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity.

2. Hide from yellow ants for they are unholy.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics near dolphins while wearing magenta tights and balancing four silver spheres on your neck.

5. Never look in ponds.