Paslabvad is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, irritating octopus.

Paslabvad created the Andromeda Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Paslabvad, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Paslabvad, he will laugh at you.

Paslabvad's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Paslabvad's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never go into orange rooms.

3. Do not kill porpoises.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.