Migfonpom is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, stupid walrus.

Migfonpom created Asia five million years ago.

If you believe in Migfonpom, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Migfonpom, it will torture you forever.

Migfonpom's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Migfonpom's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Hide if eight eagles approach from the north.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Migfonpom.

4. Do not eat bananas.

5. Always help sick mites.