Zedhab is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, unsympathetic duck.

Zedhab created the planet Mars four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zedhab, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Zedhab, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Zedhab's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Zedhab's Holy Commandments

1. Put Zedhab first in all things.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not wear pink clothing.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never talk about nucleic acids.