Fascadmum Vilbellcet is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, wise lizard.

Fascadmum Vilbellcet created the universe two million years ago.

If you believe in Fascadmum Vilbellcet, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fascadmum Vilbellcet, he will turn you into a tree.

Fascadmum Vilbellcet's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Fascadmum Vilbellcet's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Put Fascadmum Vilbellcet first in all things.

3. Never think about solid mechanics.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Feed all hungry dolphins.