Linsaggar is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, witless badger.

Linsaggar created the Small Magellanic Cloud three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Linsaggar, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Linsaggar, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Linsaggar's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Linsaggar's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Great tits are not to be trusted.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never hurt otters.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.