Farnzakfob Bepdavnib Milfed is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, smart chicken.

Farnzakfob Bepdavnib Milfed created time and space three billion years ago.

If you believe in Farnzakfob Bepdavnib Milfed, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Farnzakfob Bepdavnib Milfed, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Farnzakfob Bepdavnib Milfed's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Farnzakfob Bepdavnib Milfed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not keep five ants in a large pit.

4. Always help sheep in need.

5. Never go into brown rooms.