Funnartjad is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, dishonest mouse.

Funnartjad created the Sun nine million years ago.

If you believe in Funnartjad, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Funnartjad, she will throw large rocks at you.

Funnartjad's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Funnartjad's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

2. Run away from green birds, for they are unholy.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always pray immersed in water.