Wigfetwip Dabgomyik is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, almighty naga.

Wigfetwip Dabgomyik created the Virgo Supercluster two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wigfetwip Dabgomyik, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Wigfetwip Dabgomyik, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Wigfetwip Dabgomyik's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Wigfetwip Dabgomyik's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat mice with great respect.

2. Hide from indigo dogs for they are unholy.

3. Feed all hungry turtles.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not covet oxen.