Cinflagpag is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, moody porpoise.

Cinflagpag created the planet Venus seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cinflagpag, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cinflagpag, it will curse you with boils.

Cinflagpag's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Cinflagpag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter near moths while wearing yellow scarves and balancing eight titanium spheres on your back.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not drink water in red rooms.

4. Always look after injured badgers.

5. Erect a large copper sculpture of Cinflagpag on top of all buildings.