Nuttmilquim is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, vain hydra.

Nuttmilquim created viruses four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuttmilquim, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nuttmilquim, she will turn you into a hamster.

Nuttmilquim's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Nuttmilquim's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Erect a giant green sculpture of Nuttmilquim in the centre of the settlement.