Pitkoptif Weeyatpang is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, resourceful crocodile.

Pitkoptif Weeyatpang created dark matter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitkoptif Weeyatpang, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Pitkoptif Weeyatpang, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Pitkoptif Weeyatpang's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Pitkoptif Weeyatpang's Holy Commandments

1. Always help grasshopers in need.

2. Do not take Pitkoptif Weeyatpang's name in vain.

3. Always look after injured frogs.

4. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

5. Never think about special relativity near capybaras while wearing yellow shirts and balancing six copper spheres on your back.