Bamyarlgess is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unsympathetic zebra.

Bamyarlgess created everything that exists five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bamyarlgess, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Bamyarlgess, he will not care at all.

Bamyarlgess' most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Bamyarlgess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear blue clothing.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never think about moons.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Respect your elders.