Cimtenkin is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, self-assured dryad.

Cimtenkin created silver three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cimtenkin, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Cimtenkin, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cimtenkin's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Cimtenkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not speak about pineapples.

4. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not stand on grass.