Tonhabcub is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, dishonest jaguar.

Tonhabcub created carbon three million years ago.

If you believe in Tonhabcub, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tonhabcub, it will torture you forever.

Tonhabcub's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Tonhabcub's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Retreat if seven squirrels approach from the south.

5. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.