Jatgofyamont is a god.

She takes the form of a small, all-powerful alligator.

Jatgofyamont created the planet Jupiter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatgofyamont, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jatgofyamont, she will turn you into a puffin.

Jatgofyamont's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Jatgofyamont's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about optics.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Jatgofyamont.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.