Kipcinhog is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, weak goose.

Kipcinhog created the planet Jupiter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Kipcinhog, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Kipcinhog, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Kipcinhog's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Kipcinhog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a room before entering it.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near eagles while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Never think about dark matter.

5. Learn six new languages a year.