Bogveenhat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, two-faced hydra.

Bogveenhat created the Black Eye Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bogveenhat, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bogveenhat, it will send you a sign.

Bogveenhat's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Bogveenhat's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed bananas to horses while wearing shoes.

2. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a room before entering it.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Never hurt aardvarks.