Bissartlarnzan is a god.
She takes the form of a corpulent, slow
sheep.
Bissartlarnzan created the Andromeda Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Bissartlarnzan, she will look after you all your life.
If you do not believe in
Bissartlarnzan, she will try to impress you with rainbows.
Bissartlarnzan's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.
Bissartlarnzan's Holy Commandments1. You must pray to Bissartlarnzan five times a day.
2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.
3. You must never eat turnips.
4. Never think about chromosomes.
5. Do not stand on grass.