Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, selfish jellyfish.

Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag created the world eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag's priests.

2. Erect five carbon sculptures of Fitnurlnurl Taldanmiflag on top of important buildings.

3. You must never eat gooseberries.

4. Never feed garlic to horses while wearing gray kilts.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.