Getfigvad is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, boastful butterfly.

Getfigvad created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Getfigvad, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Getfigvad, he will ignore you.

Getfigvad's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Getfigvad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

5. Do not chop down trees.