Stertonkstan is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, conceited lion.

Stertonkstan created a quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stertonkstan, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Stertonkstan, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Stertonkstan's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Stertonkstan's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if seven mites approach from the west.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a building before entering it.

5. Do not cook food in pots.