Bumcarbep is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, calm seal.

Bumcarbep created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bumcarbep, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bumcarbep, he will turn you into a plant.

Bumcarbep's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Bumcarbep's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into magenta rooms.

2. You must never eat lemons.

3. Do not hurt doves.

4. Never sing near mites.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.