Teenbosswabraktabnigstip is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, all-powerful tortoise.

Teenbosswabraktabnigstip created silver two billion years ago.

If you believe in Teenbosswabraktabnigstip, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Teenbosswabraktabnigstip, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Teenbosswabraktabnigstip's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Teenbosswabraktabnigstip's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never go into violet rooms.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a room before entering it.