Gunquamdub is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, generous beaver.

Gunquamdub created viruses twelve years ago.

If you believe in Gunquamdub, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gunquamdub, he will manifest in front of you.

Gunquamdub's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Gunquamdub's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. You must never eat gooseberries.

4. Always obey Gunquamdub's priests.

5. Never feed lots of cucumbers to geese while wearing violet tights.