Geptaryak Neglegmap is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-confident mouse.

Geptaryak Neglegmap created the planet Mars six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Geptaryak Neglegmap, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Geptaryak Neglegmap, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Geptaryak Neglegmap's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Geptaryak Neglegmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Geptaryak Neglegmap.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never feed garlic to tortoises while wearing corsets.