Flatvendab is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, dishonest crocodile.

Flatvendab created the Sombrero Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Flatvendab, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Flatvendab, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Flatvendab's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Flatvendab's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight turtles approach from the north.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Hide if five seals approach from the east.

5. Do not sing in public.